Big Dream. Wee Step.

I was raised in a Christian home by very loving parents. I had the best of everything, and I was considered a good kid...straight A's, talented musically, taught Sunday School when I was in high school, sang in the church choir, etc. I went to a Lutheran school through 8th grade. My friends there even called me "goodie two shoes."

When I went to high school, peer pressure found me taking that first drink of alcohol just shy of my 16th birthday. This was the start of partying in high school and consistently trying to fit in with the cool kids, including guys. I still maintained my good grades and stellar reputation. I took this behavior with me to college, where I ended up meeting a guy in a bar who quickly wooed me into marrying him. He had no job, and he was an alcoholic. I stayed married to him for 13 years and endured not only alcoholism, but drug use and physical abuse. I didn't leave earlier because I was taught divorce was wrong.

Within a year of my divorce, I met another man who seemed to be just the opposite. He was kind, funny, didn't drink or do drugs. But what I discovered shortly after getting married again was that he was controlling and verbally abusive, so much so that I suffered a nervous breakdown four years into the marriage. I struggled to make this marriage work, too, but am now going through my second divorce.

All of this is leading me to what God has been laying on my heart. I see so many young girls that go down the same path as I did...drinking, partying, thinking they need to be with a guy to feel good about themselves. They are having sex at such a young age, some even purposely getting pregnant. These girls suffer from low self esteem and most likely don't have a relationship with The Lord. I want to reach out to these girls and help them to know Jesus and to know their body is God's temple and to know how much God loves them and has a wonderful plan for their life. I want to minister to these girls so that they don't make the same mistakes I did--so that they can find a wonderful mate and have a wonderful relationship with their Lord and Savior.

I'm not sure how I would go about doing this. It's tough to get young girls today to listen to such a message. I've been told at work that I am a great presenter--that people genuinely like to listen to what I say, and I think perhaps I need to use this gift to begin ministering to young girls. Lord, I pray that you will show me what Your will is for my life, and if this is an area that You want me to be in, show me, open my eyes, to see what I need to do.

Healthy Living

Last session I was complaining about how stressed I was, and guess what, last week I became sick. It started with chills and aches, and then I was down with a fever for two days and then sinus congestion after that. I missed two days of work and did nothing but sleep. My body was absolutely exhausted. Even once I felt better, I still took a two-hour nap on Sunday.

I realized that God was telling me, "Slow down, you can't keep up this pace." So, this week, I have been leaving work after no more than 9 hours. I have not been bringing home my laptop. I have made a healthy, sensible meal for my daughter and me every night. I have spent no more than 1 hour at home taking care of house chores. I have sat and watched at least 30 minutes of television to unwind. I have been in bed every night by 10 p.m. I have exercised every single day.

This is my new take on life, and while it's only been 3 days, I'm feeling pretty confident so far, and it feels great! I have felt a closer relationship with God during this time as well, knowing that taking care of me and my body is what God intends for me to do.